Welcome Wisdom

The Shift from Reactive to Intentional Aging- and Six Decisions to Make before 80

by Louie Handugan, Incoming Director of Care Management

In our January newsletter, we explored what it really means to age with intention—how growing older isn’t simply about adding years, but about adding direction and meaning to those years. This month, we’re taking that idea one step further. If intention is the engine, design is the roadmap. It’s time to move from thinking about aging thoughtfully to shaping it deliberately.

Most of us don’t wake up and declare, “Today, I’m going to age intentionally.” More often, we slide into aging one doctor’s appointment, one misplaced pair of glasses, and one twinge in the knee at a time.

But aging doesn’t have to be something that simply happens to us. It can be something we create. Many of us spend years planning vacations, careers, and family events down to the last detail… yet somehow skip planning for the longest chapter of life. It’s as if aging is that polite guest we assume will knock loudly before entering—only to discover it is already here.

The more intentionally we approach aging, the more freedom, stability, and peace of mind we gain. That’s the heart of the shift from reactive to intentional aging.

 

From Putting Out Fires to Planting Seeds

Reactive aging happens when we wait for a crisis before making decisions. It’s the scramble after a fall, the rushed hospital discharge, the “we should’ve talked about this sooner” moment.

Intentional aging is different. It’s proactive, thoughtful, and empowering. It’s the difference between drifting wherever the current takes you and charting your own course with purpose.

Intentional aging invites us to ask:

• What do I want my life to look like as I grow older?
• What matters most to me?
• How do I stay in the driver’s seat?

 

The Six Decisions Every Older Adult Should Make Before 80

These aren’t gloomy decisions. They’re liberating ones. They help ensure that your future reflects your values, preferences, & hopes—not just circumstances.

1. Where do I want to live out my life?

Aging in place is wonderful…until the home becomes more obstacle course than sanctuary. Thinking ahead about safety, accessibility, and long-term needs can prevent stressful, rushed moves.

2. Who will speak for me if I can’t?

Choosing a healthcare proxy or power of attorney isn’t just paperwork. It’s choosing someone you trust to honor your voice when you can’t speak.

3. What kind of medical care aligns with my values?

Advance directives and honest conversations about quality of life ensure that care reflects what matters most to you—not what others assume you’d want.

4. How will I stay socially connected?

Loneliness is more than an emotion—it’s a health risk. Building a plan for connection, community, and meaningful relationships is essential for well-being.

5. How will I manage my finances wisely?

Clarity around finances reduces stress and increases independence.

6. What matters most to me?

Independence? Family? Faith? Dignity? These values should guide every future decision.

 

Why These Decisions Matter

Intentional aging isn’t about controlling every detail. It’s about choosing the things you can control and making peace with the rest. When these decisions are made early, they create a roadmap that reflects your priorities and protects your independence. And let’s be honest: it’s far easier to make thoughtful decisions in calm moments than in the middle of a crisis.

 

A Final Thought

Aging with intention is an act of courage and clarity. It’s choosing to design the road ahead rather than simply traveling it. Whether you’re approaching these decisions for yourself or supporting a loved one, the goal is the same: a future shaped by purpose, dignity, and joy.